Be straight, not straightened. Marcus Aurelius 3.5

To the pure all things are pure. Independence requires emancipation not just from others' expectations of you, but also from your expectations of them.

Μήτε ἀκούσιος ἐνέργει μήτε ἀκοινώνητος μήτε ἀνεξέταστος μήτε ἀνθελκόμενος· μήτε κομψεία τὴν διάνοιάν σου καλλωπιζέτω· μήτε πολυρρήμων μήτε πολυπράγμων ἔσο. ἔτι δὲ ὁ ἐν σοὶ θεὸς ἔστω προστάτης ζῴου ἄρρενος καὶ πρεσβύτου καὶ πολιτικοῦ καὶ Ῥωμαίου καὶ ἄρχοντος, ἀνατεταχότος ἑαυτόν, οἷος ἂν εἴη τις περιμένων τὸ ἀνακλητικὸν ἐκ τοῦ βίου εὔλυτος, μήτε ὅρκου δεόμενος μήτε ἀνθρώπου τινὸς μάρτυρος. ἐνέστω δὲ τὸ φαιδρὸν καὶ τὸ ἀπροσδεὲς τῆς ἔξωθεν ὑπηρεσίας καὶ τὸ ἀπροσδεὲς ἡσυχίας, ἣν ἄλλοι παρέχουσιν. ὀρθὸν οὖν εἶναι χρή, οὐχὶ ὀρθούμενον.

Avoid actions that are against your will, that commit you to interests you do not have, that admit no leisure for scrutiny, or that drag you away from what you should be doing. Don't let manners cloud your mind, dressing it to please. Be not a babbler, nor a busybody. Let your inner deity preside over a male animal that is aged, familiar with the city, a Roman, and a ruler accustomed to taking his own orders, awaiting at ease his summons away from the ranks of the living, needing no oath or witness to speed that final passage. Be cheerful and bright, needing from others neither service nor silence. Your task is to be straight, so that you require no adjustment.